Out of the Desert

201101_094_Desert_artSince 1973, many Americans have felt lost, isolated and scorned as they looked for some kind of direction to deal with their unwanted same sex attractions. In late 1973, the board of trustees of the American Psychiatric Association (APA) voted to drop homosexuality, per se, as a mental disorder. Ten board members, who voted 6-4, decided to simply obliterate its century old psychological definition by a consensus agreement. This has left those with unwanted same-sex attraction to aimlessly look for direction to find their true selves. The APA’s tragic decision has left many with unwanted SSA alone in the desert for 40 years.

To make matters worse, for decades, many heterosexuals have scorned, humiliated, and shunned homosexuals. Instead of helping them out of the desert, they built up walls to keep them there. Not finding love, affirmation, and acceptance from heterosexuals, many with unwanted SSA decided to stop their isolated suffering. These men and women only wanted what everyone else wanted: to belong, to be accepted, and to be loved. The Gay Movement was born out of these simple, psychological, and emotional needs. The gay movement defended, fought for, and won over the hearts of many homosexuals, their parents, and their friends.

Is it any wonder then that homosexuals have built up walls to keep any non-gay affirming information away? Today’s homosexuals do not even want to hear about 21st century strides in understanding the causes and the resolution for same sex attraction (all of which, by the way, deal with issues that a specialized, trained, licensed clinical therapist could facilitate had the APA’s 6-4 ruling been allowed to be scientifically challenged, disproven and overruled.)

Most gays I’ve talked to are unaware of the latest discoveries about gender identity development, the healing of memories, the healing of post-traumatic stress disorder, and the remarkable ability of the brain to reorder pathways. They are unaware of twin studies which literally disprove any “Born Gay” theory. They are also unaware that they were not affirmed in their gender identity, perhaps since they were 18 months old. They are completely unaware of the thousands of authentic success stories of reoriented men and women.  

What we need is a loving voice to reach those is the desert, to welcome them back, and to offer them wholeness. We need a new Moses.

Gisele Roy is a parent of a son in his twenties who has battled SSA for 13 years. She has struggled with the emotional pain of seeing her son experience rejection from his peers, loneliness, and deep depression. It is Gisele’s hope that she, her husband and her son will continue to work on healing the deep-seated pain and emotional causes of his SSA and that her son will be able to find a wife who will complement him in every way.

One thought on “Out of the Desert

  1. Christopher Doyle

    1. Dr. Neil Whitehead has wrote extensively on this subject of the genetics and biology of same-sex attraction. He generally believes, as I do, that biology plays a very small factor in the development of same-sex attraction. According to his recent article based on a meta-analysis he did on Twin studies, he said the following:

    “At best genetics is a minor factor,” says Dr. Neil Whitehead, PhD. Whitehead worked for the New Zealand government as a scientific researcher for 24 years, then spent four years working for the United Nations and International Atomic Energy Agency. Most recently, he serves as a consultant to Japanese universities about the effects of radiation exposure. His PhD is in biochemistry and statistics.

    Identical twins have the same genes or DNA. They are nurtured in equal prenatal conditions. If homosexuality is caused by genetics or prenatal conditions and one twin is gay, the co-twin should also be gay.

    “Because they have identical DNA, it ought to be 100%,” Dr. Whitehead notes. But the studies reveal something else. “If an identical twin has same-sex attraction the chances the co-twin has it are only about 11% for men and 14% for women.”

    For more information, visit: http://www.hollanddavis.com/?p=3647

    2. 100 years of research does indeed show that some people with homosexual feelings do experience change, on a continuum, to heterosexuality. See the landscape research review here:


    Additionally, A recent study indicated that while heterosexual feelings are more stable in both genders, women might have even more fluidity in their same-sex attractions than men. Similarly, previous research has found that heterosexual attractions are 17 times more stable in men and 30 times more stable in women than homosexual attractions.


    Mock, S.E. & Eibach, R.P. (2011). Stability and Change in Sexual Orientation Identity Over a 10-Year Period in Adulthood. Archives of Sexual Behavior. Retrieved 10/31/2013 online at: http://midus.wisc.edu/findings/pdfs/1153.pdf

    Kinnish K.K., Strassberg D.S., & Turner C.W. (2005). Sex differences in the flexibility of sexual orientation: a multidimensional retrospective assessment. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 34, 175-83.

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